January. The only good thing about January is it’s about done. The worst thing about this January is it’s an election year. The bull is piling up faster than the snow.

Kerry wins the first showdown in Iowa. Who cares? It’s Iowa, where approximately 25 people live, none of them sane or they wouldn’t live in Iowa. I didn’t hear who won on the Republican side? They seem confident it was Bush. If I were them, I’d rethink that.

The coach of the Rams and Green Bay are cowards. They didn’t play to win, and they lost. Flubbers, both of them.

How about those Cubs? They’re after Greg Maddux, a for-sure Hall of Famer. And he should have at least 2 or 3 good games left in him.

The governor sure seems upset with the Illinois educational system. And who can blame him. I think the real problem is his wife doesn’t want to live with him in Springfield. She hates it. Who can blame her. So he’s a little cranky. Maybe he needs a girlfriend. There are a lot of women in Springfield after these government types. Good pensions.

The January Flub again has to go to our dearly beloved President. His kickoff speech for his 2004 campaign was quite a pack of lies. The sad part is the idiots in Congress jump up and clap every time he tells one. The bottom line is the President’s tax cuts for the wealthy have robbed the treasury of the money it needs to address real problems and has threatened long-term economy security. Bush took more time in his campaign speech to badmouth the use of steroids in sports than he did to talk about energy and the environment. And as the Peever has suggested previously, Social Security is on his mind. He really wants to privatize it. He wants us to be able to invest our money in the stock market. Obviously, that would require a loss of money in the Social Security pool, moving it into the private sector pool, so his buddies can buy swimming pools. This leaves a hole in the available monies to pay out to retirees. That means more social programs will be cut or the government debt will disastrously grow. And he wants us to put more money into war and homeland security, both leftover illusions from 9/11. Bush likes to wrap his world domination theme in the illusionary bows of democracy, patriotism, and Christian martyrdom. He Flubbingly found his way into the White House, and has done nothing but continue to Flub. In fact, he has taken the standards of Flubbing to new heights. From here on out, the rest of you are going to have to try harder, or he’s going to sweep the Flubs for 2004. Frankly, it couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. So here’s to you, Mr. President: May your days of Flubbing be numbered, and may your nights be filled with nightmares of what it is you’re doing to the world.