Leave it to Peever

 

It donÕt feel good

 

— Bumper sticker of the week: After we rebuild Iraq, can we rebuild our schools?

— Quote of the week: ÒCatch a man a fish, and you can sell it to him. Teach a man to fish and you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.Ó Karl Marx

— Ten ways to figure youÕve been screwed: 1. If the government says itÕs best for you, look out. 2. If youÕre bent over and you feel something creepy sneaking up your backside, itÕs too late. 3. If your boss says youÕll get a raise sometime in the future, I hope youÕre not smiling. 4. If a minister comforts you by telling you youÕll get your just reward in Heaven rather that here on Earth, you been had. 5. If they tell you youÕre going to war for Òtruth, justice, and the American Way,Ó you better make sure theyÕre using a condom. 6. YouÕre screwed if you ever think the rich will give you a break. 7. Gas prices are up. So are they. 8. If you think the attack on 9/11 was a clear-cut case of terrorists attacking the U.S. out of the blue, you not only been screwed, but you must be blonde. 9. With a President like we got, weÕre all screwed. 10. Being screwed is only half what weÕre getting. They want us to smile.

— In defense of the new city manager, he seems like an alright guy. But a city manager should not be in charge of the city. The mayor and city council should be in charge. ThatÕs who we elected. We did not elect the city manager. He should have no direction for the city other than the direction the mayor and council direct him in. And thatÕs a direct quote from The Peever.

— Speaking of leaders: Lee Iacocca has out a new book, Where Have All The Leaders Gone? You could always count on Lee for a brilliant deduction. We ainÕt got poor leadership. We ainÕt got any. From the White House to the outhouse, weÕre running low on anyone with the slightest ability to step out front and take us to the promised land. Everyone at the top is for themselves, at the expense of us. TheyÕll sell you out in a second to make themselves rich. Galesburg is full of it, from Maytag, to Butler, to Gates, to Wal-Mart, to all the ma and pa businesses unwilling to pay their employees a living wage, with benefits. How is it they can give themselves raises, or stock options, or live in big fancy home, but claim they ainÕt got enough to pay us a decent wage? The guys on top are after our blood. There are few exceptions. Look at their retirement plan, and look at yours. Capitalism is proving that Marx was 100% right when he said: ÒCapitalist production, therefore, develops technology, and the combining together of various processes into a social whole, only by sapping the original sources of all wealth — the soil and the laborers.Ó

— Ode to Jerry Falwell: Five truths about the left: 1. Playing left field is not for the timid or faint-of-heart. With characters like Bush, Cheney, Limbaugh, Hannity, Coulter, OÕReilly, Dobson, and Robertson spreading the bull around, one needs to watch where they step. You donÕt want to pick up any of that stink. 2. Never in one day take more than ten turns to the right. This applies to walking, driving, and reading the Bible. 3. If you intend on ruling the world from the left, do just the opposite of Bush. YouÕll do just fine. 4. They say the Left are nothing but a bunch of whinny wieners. I say thatÕs better than being a right-wing murdering, thieving, masturbator, who has no heart, no brain, no sense, and is probably cheating on his wife, most likely with another guy. 5. It is much better to have leftovers than rightovers, any way you look at it.