LEAVE IT TO PEEVER
Working class heroes
— Bumper sticker of the week: A system that robs Peter to pay Paul will always have PaulÕs support.
— Quotes of the week: ÒEvery American who is prepared to run for President should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.Ó Gore Vidal
ÒIn America, any boy may become President and I suppose itÕs just one of the risks he takes.Ó Adlai Stevenson
— Questions about The Peeves:
¥ Do you know anything? I know a little about a lot and hardly anything about most things.
¥ How long have you been writing this crap? Too long.
¥ Have you written any books? Several. The last was, ÒWhy All Politicians are Perfect Assholes.Ó I wrote it with a proctologist from Jersey.
¥ Where do you get all your goofy stuff from? I read the Register-Mail.
¥ Do you have any idea how many people you offend? At last count, they tell me about 96.7%. Hopefully, after this week, IÕll move up to around 98.3%.
¥ Are you accountable to anyone? To my higher power — the editor. Luckily, he canÕt read. He went to Knox.
¥ Are all your stories and statistics accurate? IÕve only made two mistakes in the 11 years this column has appeared. I gave credit to the EDC (now GREDA) for bringing Santa Claus to town, and I mentioned that the mayor and city council all seemed to be of average intelligence. I was wrong on both accounts.
— Answers (You supply the questions):
¥ Yes, IÕve occasionally thought of that.
¥ I think itÕs possible, however, IÕve never personally seen it done.
¥ Sex is always an issue.
¥ Probably two or three times a week.
¥ I retired. I donÕt need to bend over any more.
¥ Try telling that to my wife.
— Good ways to make use of bad habits:
¥ Dress like a nun on Halloween.
¥ Write a book about your miserable life.
¥ If you lie a lot, go to law school.
¥ If you enjoy shooting people, join the Army.
¥ Become a professional wine taster.
¥ Put doing nothing to good use. Become a politician.
— Working class heroes: HereÕs to the guys and gals who put in a hard dayÕs work. The times have been tough: wages down, benefits gone, hours up, and many of the jobs people have made a decent living at are gone. There are no highfalutin reasons other than corporations wanting to make higher profits. Welcome to BushWorld. The greatness of this country was built, and continues to rest, on its citizens and their willingness to put in a hard days work, at fair wages, for decent benefits, and a reasonable level of assurance that they will have a job to go to in the morning. Over the last 12 years or so, all these things have been in jeopardy. Our working class heroes have not gotten a ticker-tape parade, they have been given the shaft. As a result, we are not the country we once were. Our economy is less, our politics are less, and our spirit is diminished. It is time for a working class revolution. In order to buy our labor, the transaction needs to be fair and mutually beneficial. When that balance is lost, so are we.