– Bumper sticker of the week: My dogma is bigger than your karma.

– Quote of the week: "Those are my principles. If you don’t like them, I have others. –Groucho Marx

"No matter how cynical you get, it’s almost impossible to keep up." –Lily Tomlin

– Pre-election propaganda: They say retail sales are up. I must not shop in the same places "they" do. And the economy is getting better. I told that to a guy holding a sign on Henderson St. willing to do work for food. He wasn’t impressed. Manufacturing is up. All three manufacturing plants left in America must be getting a little more work. You can tell the election is coming up. The crap is beginning to fly. And speaking of flying. The president flies over to Iraq for a secret visit with our troops. If he’d have flown over there two years ago to talk to Saddam, maybe we wouldn’t be in the mess we’re in. Now he flies over to make a secret guest appearance. This guy is better than Bob Hope. If he wants to show us how brave he is, how about flying a couple missions over Texas? This idiot will do anything to get re-elected, which is obviously going to include putting on quite a show.

– How about those Cubs?

– Peever law #24: If someone tells you that they know the Truth–run.

– I got a new computer: I got a Dell. What a deal. I plugged it in and entered the world of high-tech shenanigans. About two hours later, my computer was taken over by outside forces. As I was to learn, the proper term for what I got was Spy-Wared, with a Trojan Horse thrown in for good measure. I had to take my brand new computer to Dr. Mike’s for an exorcism. Oh brother!

– Some of my favorite eating places:

• Landmark Café: It’s comfortable, has some not-so-ordinary entrees, and good service. A little pricey, but worth it. I particularly like the Wellington Crepe, with a Black Forest Crepe kicker.

• Old Peking: I like the buffet. I’d kill for the green beans. The waitresses are always fun. I asked one to marry me. She just laughed and handed me another plate.

• Jalisco’s: I like the Mexican omelets, although I’m not supposed to have eggs. I like the fact that they don’t reminded me of that fact.

• Rib Shack: I like the spicy sauce. Usually I have the BBQ chicken, since I’m not supposed to have a lot of meat.

• Club 41: This place has been a standard for years. Fried everything, which of course I’m not supposed to have.

• Crappy’s: This is the place for wings. Big, meaty, and they come in about eight different ways. You might say they’re Crappy, which is the same as saying they’re bad, which really means good.

• The New Friendly Cafe: Still the best breakfast in town. And their hamburgers aren’t bad, either.

• For pizza, I go to Chicago.

– Peever law #15: Every now and then, the underdog wins one.

– Al Gore backs Dean: There’s a blow to his campaign.

– The oil seeps from Bush’s ears: In 1999—2000, Bush received more than $1.5 million in contributions from Big Oil and Gas. The results: VP Cheney was CEO of Halliburton Oil, now making billions in Iraq; Gale Norton, Secretary of the Interior, a protegee of James Watt, defended the lead paint industry, and argued against the Endangered Species Act; J. Stephen Griles, Deputy Secretary of the Interior, was a former VP of a mining company, and another Watt protege; and Rebecca Watson, Assistant Secretary of Land and Minerals Management, was a former lawyer for gas, timber and petroleum interests. This is supposed to add up to a group of people protecting the environment. What it adds up to is a heyday for corporate oil concerns after public lands. Bush should be charged with gang banging the environment.